Although I have never been religious or believed in a particular Higher Power, I have always believed in destiny and fate. It is phenomenal to observe the way life plays out, who we meet, where we end up going, and what we end up doing. People come into our lives, and we are presented with circumstances that appear to be nothing short of miraculous. Events occur that are very often unexplainable, and it brings up a single question: Why? Why was I given the chance to do this? Why did I encounter this person? Why didn't I end up in, let's say, Los Angeles and not New York and Boston? I like to tell myself that we're never in the wrong place, with the wrong people, or doing the wrong thing, because in one way or another, the adventures and situations that we immerse ourselves in are serving a purpose in the greater picture of our lives. Sometimes the situations are challenging, the people are difficult, and the places are lonely, but in the long run, it are these challenges and these miracles that complete our destinies. When I was in high school, I would often sing a duet with my best friend, and the lyrics match this idea perfectly: "I've heard it said that people come into our lives for a reason, bringing something we must learn. And we are lead to those who help us most to grow if we let them, and we help them in return..."
Who we encounter and why we encounter them is fascinating in itself. Allow me to give you an example:
As I was riding down the bike path, a scruffy looking young man pulled up alongside me and asked me for directions to the library. We chatted for a little while, and soon enough I found out that he was a British recent college graduate, just finishing a cross-country bike ride. He found himself on the West Coast three weeks ahead of schedule, so he didn't research the housing options he had out here very well. Unfortunately for him, there is no camping in Sonoma, so I was suggesting he ride up into the hills and find a small plot of land to pitch his tent for the evening; however, just as I was making this suggestion, my dad rode up on his bike. The three of us chatted for a bit, when my dad offered for the young British boy to stay at our house. My dad had gone on a cross-country bike ride when he was in his twenties, and he has been waiting twenty-something years to return all of the favors that he was given. On top of it all, it was a Tuesday, which means Farmer's Market was happening later that evening, which means that it was the most perfect day to be in Sonoma.
Ben, the British boy, rode home with me, showered, pitched his little tent in the backyard, and ventured down to Farmer's Market with us, where he was able to really experience and observe the perfect evening in the small Wine Country town. Here is where I began to wonder why.. Why, out of all of the people in this small town, was I the person this boy decided to ask for information? I don't want to praise myself or anything, but he couldn't have found a more perfect person to ask; I grew up in town, so I know pretty much everything about it, my dad is an avid cyclist, so as far as chatting with someone who knows what you've been going through and experiencing, he couldn't have found a more perfect family. I just thought it was so amazing that I had been back in Sonoma for a mere sixteen or so hours and was immediately faced with this unfamiliar, interesting person. What about me gave him the idea that I would have been able to give him the information that he needed? As far as he was concerned, I could have been a random tourist who had rented a cute little bike for cruising around town. And for Ben's sake alone, why did he decide to come to Sonoma on a Tuesday? What if he had showed up the day before and missed out on such a lovely, hometown evening? I'm sure his life would have gone along flawlessly had he not come into town on a Tuesday evening, but it was an evening that wouldn't have otherwise been a part of the bigger story of his trip.
Last Winter, I became quite fascinated with Chris McCandless, aka Alexander Supertramp, aka the young man who gave away everything he owned, hitch-hiked around the US for a good two years, working his way up to Alaska, where he ended up dying in a small bus in the Alaskan wilderness. The book "Into the Wild" was written about his story back in the mid-90's, and ten years later, Sean Penn directed a movie about this young man. Ben vaguely reminded me of Chris McCandless, in the way that he interacted with our family. He was educated, beyond polite, lived very minimally, and was very vague about his own life. After reading about the different ways that both Chris McCandless and the people he had encountered were influenced by his travels, it made me feel honored to be able to be a part of this Chris McCandless-like experience. I would like to think that this twelve hour encounter somehow boosted our karma points, although dwelling on it may oppose the idea of a selfless good deed... Hmm... Either way, I hope Ben's travels end up being fantastic, and I hope that he never forgets us!
....
My trip home was delightful. It was a fairly non-stop trip, but I felt very relaxed the whole time, which I really love. Monday night, after my dad picked me up at the airport, we met my mom and Claire at Yu Shang for a delicious sushi dinner. Tuesday I went to visit Bethany, saw some friends, and had the Ben encounter (Bencounter?) Anyway, of course I saw every person I have ever met in my lifetime at Farmer's Market that night, which was fun, especially after spending the entire month of August alone. Wednesday and Thursday kind of blur together, but I know they must have consisted of a lot of bike riding, big hugs, and catching up with old friends. Sierra and I went to the beach all day on Friday and just talked and talked and talked, so much so that it was suddenly four o'clock and both of us were burnt to an absolute crisp (something neither of us fully realized until we were back in Sonoma. Ouch!) We had a really nice dinner at the Red Grape, and I swear to god we never stopped talking. It was so nice! That night, a big group of us went to a fun hookah bar on Haight Street, ate food, chatted... I'd never been to a hookah bar before and had only smoked from a hookah one time, but I had an absolute blast!
*Quick note: We're flying over Utah right now, and The Great Salt Lake is deep red in color, much like rust, with a white shoreline. How bizarre! I wonder if it looks like that when you're standing in front of it, not just from a bird's eye view...
Claire's birthday was on Saturday, so we spent all day in the city. We had a huge Dim Sum lunch in the Sunset District, and afterwards, my mom, Claire, and I went shopping at the Stonestown Mall. Oh, the thrill of new undergarments :) It was lovely being able to have some Anderson girl time, although Erika wasn't able to make it up there. (WE MISSED YOU SISTER! We understand though, you're a busy woman!) After we got home, Claire went out with some of her friends, so I packed and did some laundry before dad and I had a nice pasta dinner. I drove around, said my goodbyes to everyone, and woke up this morning at four AM to get to Oakland by six! My mom and I were hoping to have breakfast with a friend, but it didn't work out. But now, here I am, 36,000 feet in the air, about to actually begin my life in New York City. When the man at the ticket counter asked where I was going, I accidentally told him that I was going to Boston, so I had to correct myself. It's still going to take some getting used to, apparently.
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Sunday, September 6, 2009
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
memories in music.
"How Bizarre" by OMC
When this mid-90's tune hits my ears, all I see is my mom's little white Toyota (again, hahah) driving down Arnold Drive through the SDC. It's usually either Spring or Fall in my memory, the air is fresh and temperate, and those incredible trees are either full of gorgeous green leaves, or the array of multicolored leaves have half fallen on the road. I am about seven or eight years old in my mind, wondering what "bizarre" means, and curious as to which parts of this song are actually bizarre. (It's funny to me that Erika hears this song and thinks of driving around with our babysitter.. I never made that association!)
"Right Moves" by Josh Ritter
Given this man is the one current artist that I never have and never will get tired of, it was difficult to choose one of his songs that stands out the most for me. This particular song is so uplifting, so exhilarating, mixing rock instruments, string instruments, horns, a simple melody, and an immense amount of enthusiasm. The line that follows the instrumental sings "I heard the night birds picking up their song, you threw your hair back and you sang along..." and I cannot hear that line without feeling giddy! The instrumental has such a strong build up, and by the time Josh comes back in, there is so much momentum and energy, it's difficult not to get excited. At his concert with the Boston Pops, I could have sworn that he smiled at me during that line too :)
"Playground Love" by Air
High school, mary jane, driving down Arnold Drive near Leveroni Road, my infatuation with a certain co-worker... This song has such a relaxing tone, it's difficult not to close your eyes and just sway to the beat. I know this was on the "Virgin Suicides" soundtrack, but sometimes I can picture this playing along to a sped-up film of a road.. a time lapse of sorts.. driving down a two-lane, foggy road, lined with redwood trees...
"Falling Slowly" by Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova
I saw their film "ONCE" just before I moved to Boston and absolutely fell in love with it and the soundtrack. When I first moved here, I was so full of excitement, newfound independence, and hope for love, and this song was especially prevalent in my life. The lyrics are simple yet relatable, and the harmony is one that can easily get the tears flowing. I picture myself sitting on the 77 up Mass Ave. in Arlington, staring at my cute bus driver, anticipating the chilly Northeastern air outside on my walk up to the house where I babysat, trying not to slip on the icy brick sidewalks.
"My Heart Will Go On" by Celine Dion
Anyone who was a preteen when this song came out knows why it made my memory list. I think I speak for every girl when I say that Jack Dawson was our first love, and I don't think any further explanation is necessary.
"Ladies and Gentlemen" by Saliva
Knowing me, this song is quite out of character, but allow me to explain. Jennelle moved into our apartment in September, and that fall, this song was part of some video game commercial that played every so often, and I loved it! I thought it was stupid to like a song that was part of a video game, so I never said anything. I was so intimidated by Jennelle's love of Metallica, System of a Down, and WBCN, her accent, and her humor, and I was convinced that I was too much of a goody-goody to be friends with someone so "hardcore" (I know this sounds like an exaggeration, but I'm serious!) Anyway, the video game commercial came on, and I quietly said, "I know this is lame, but I really like this song," and Jennelle was like, "Me too! I didn't want to say anything though!" "OMG me either!" I probably responded, and from then on, I was no longer intimidated by Jennelle. The cool girl and I had something in common, and I was set!
"Sensitive" by Jewel
This song radiates everything that is my incredible twin sister. As an innocent first grader, Erika heard this song and decided it was her favorite. Her distinctive round handwriting is in the front of our Dunbar yearbook, establishing this as her favorite song and Anabelle as her best friend. Listening to it now, I cannot help but cry. Erika has always been so wise beyond her years, so thoughtful and so intelligent, and I don't think she's ever gotten enough credit for it. For a six year old to hear this song and relate to it is phenomenal, and I can guarantee you she knew the deep meanings of what Jewel had written... "You always tell me that it's impossible to be respected and be a girl" ... I can just hear that little girl declaring that she was not going to let that happen in her life. She has always had such a sure sense of herself, her life, her morals and goals, and I admire her more than words can express.
"Time After Time" by Ella Fitzgerald
I don't know if Ella was the first to sing this, but her version is definitely one of my favorites. This song was number six on my list of songs to record for my senior project, and I only ended up recording five. Before I die, I am promising myself that I'm going to perform this on some occasion, be it in a studio, in a club somewhere (with my new roommate?! haha), who knows. I have a plan for this song too, but I don't want to write it anywhere and spoil the surprise, but hopefully within the next five or so years, my plan can be put into action! Such a beautiful love song.
"Marry You" by Eric Clapton and BB King
When this album came out, my uncle bought it for every single person he knew, trying to spread the glory that is the two of these great musicians collaborating. This was roughly around the time that my uncle and Phyllis had fallen in love, and I know that he probably thinks of her when he hears this song. It's a great song as it is, but knowing that it was the anthem of two incredible people falling in love with one another makes it all the more beautiful to me.
"Into the Mystic" by Van Morrison
One of the greatest songs of all time, hands down. I don't know if Hunter and I ever declared this as our song, but I will always think of him when I hear it. The soft guitar in the beginning, the simple verses, and the climactic chorus makes the heart beat much stronger.
"Pride and Joy" by Stevie Ray Vaughan
All I see is Highway 37, just past Sears Point, windows down, summertime, SRV blasting over the speakers, my dad playing seatbelt guitar like it's his job. He's so good! If I was driving, he'd have to listen to some Jimi (since Jimi was a lefty), but otherwise it was all about Stevie Ray Vaughan. Oh my god, I'm cracking up.. My dad is so cool! I can just see him biting his lower lip, squinting his eyes, and rocking out on his seatbelt with such devotion and power, you'd think he was a rockstar in his past life. Maybe he's where I get my musical talent! We'd take these random trips down to Marin, either to go hiking, see my grandparents, discover some new independent bike store, or just to go on an adventure for no reason.
"Feel it Now" by Black Rebel Motorcycle Club
"I'm on my own I'm sure I'll know it now, I'm on my own I'm sure I'll feel it now..." was the line I listened to over and over again in my homesickness. The song is comprised of a simple piano melody and a hauntingly beautiful harmony. A guitar comes in halfway through the song, but other than that, it is simple and enchanting.
"Somewhere Over The Rainbow" by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole
Where do I even begin my admiration for this rendition?! Not only is his voice one of the most soothing voices that has ever graced my ears, he combined two of the most amazing songs into such a emotion medley. It does bother me that the lyrics of "Somewhere Over The Rainbow" are not exactly what Judy Garland had originally sung, but I digress. "What a Wonderful World" was my Granny's favorite song, and while I will always cry at Louis' version, the second Israel starts singing, I cannot help but get a little weepy.
"The Way" by Fastball
I hope my mom remembers this moment, because it was what made me terrified of singing in public throughout my childhood. Let me tell a quick story before I explain the memory: When I was a little girl, I went through a phase where I wasn't that big of a fan of school, so I would pretend to be sick just to be able to stay home all day and watch music videos on VH1. All of the cool music played on MTV, but I preferred VH1 for some reason. Anyway, during this time, I was introduced to this band, Fastball. "The Way" was their new song, the music video was adventurous and cool, and I wanted nothing more than to be able to hear it whenever I wanted. Anyway, we were at Tower Records one day, and I went straight for the personal listening station, put on the headphones, and turned on this song as loud as I could. I was ecstatic, singing, dancing in place.. I looked over at my mom to share my thrill with someone, only to be greeted with the stares of every person in the store. My mom came running over, mortified, to let me know that I had been singing loudly off-key, and everyone in the store had heard me. SO embarrassing, right?! Ugh, I was humiliated. Thank god I was a kid so I could get away with it, but to this day, I will never forget standing in Tower, wearing my cream colored dress with purple flowers and my Tevas, rocking out to this song.
"Mardi Gras Fever" by Gatorbeat
You cannot grow up in Sonoma without being a fan of Gatorbeat. Every one of their songs has the ability to make even the shyest person get up and dance (me, for instance), but this song is what I think of when I think of them. We would travel around Northern California going to crawdad festivals, oceanside shows, hanging out with Richie's kids, dancing with beads around our necks, friendship necklaces, and being carefree hippy kids. The Domingue family is so loving and so incredibly optimistic, and I feel so honored to be able to know them personally. Gatorbeat's music epitomizes my childhood, and I LOVE IT!
"Nessun Dorma" by Luciano Pavarotti
There is no other way to play this song other than loudly and surrounded by the sound from all angles. It is such a passionate, climactic song, guaranteed to get the tears flowing if the timing is right and the emotions are vulnerable. Manowar did a rendition of this song (my knowledge of this is what got the head chef at my restaurant to think I was cool!) I personally do not think that anyone can top Pavarotti. He made this song as epic and definitive as could have been possible. Amazing!
"The Sea" by Morcheeba
I love my mom so much. My whole life, she has stressed the importance of the ocean in our life, taught us to trust how sacred it is, how to care about it as a way of healing, therapy, and stress reducer. We would hop in The Van, boogie boards in the back, surf board tied to the top of the car (stopping every fifteen minutes to try to get rid of the whistling the straps had created.. SO FUNNY!) We would make our way to Doran, Salmon Creek, or Bolinas, our little picnic basket filled with chips, salsa, homemade chicken salad, and a various piece of fruit. There is one stretch of road that winds its way through the hills right before the beaches appear, and that's what I think of when I hear this song.. I can picture our van cruising down the mountains, S-curving every which way, until finally the ocean became visible over the horizon.
"Fix Up, Look Sharp" by Dizzee Rascal
While we were working on Pippin, there was an orgy scene that we had to rewrite in order to make the show PG, and Cat had the brilliant idea of having a dance off instead. In order to inspire us and show us what she had in mind, we spent one rehearsal watching "RiZe", a documentary about the dance style "krumping" and its history in LA. This song was one of the main songs they danced to, so as a warm up, we would play this, stand in a circle, and just dance. We had to close our eyes and just let the music and the beat take ahold of our bodies and just let go. Every person had to go in the middle of the circle and dance by themselves, and I credit my ability to dance in public to this process. I still have very little rhythm, but this song always makes me want to dance.
"Take Five" by The Dave Brubeck Quartet
What an incredible piece of music, huh? Sometimes it reminds me of the old Chips Ahoy commercials, other times it reminds me of "Pleasantville", but mostly I think of Bethany and I going on adventures. We made a CD of all of the fantastic driving songs we could think of, and this was number one. The strongest memory I have with this song is that unbelievably long tunnel in Sausalito, heading out towards that old fort and Rodeo Beach.. do you know the one? It goes through the mountain?
"She's Only Happy In The Sun" by Ben Harper
I listened to this song over and over again while Erika, Grandma, and I were in Bermuda. At that point, Erika had an iPod and I didn't, so when she wasn't looking or around, I would steal it and just play this song. I was beginning to enter a pretty difficult time in my life, personally, and Ben Harper's voice was more than soothing. Being in Bermuda, I thought this to be especially appropriate, and once I was back in Sonoma, in the middle of my difficult time, I would listen to this and remember how amazing it felt to be laying in the warm sunshine, stretched out on that floating dock in the middle of that warm water, watching the planes take off and land... It still makes me a little sad to listen to it, knowing it was the anthem of my upset, lonely fifteen-year-old self.
"Layla (unplugged)" by Eric Clapton
Before I could even read very well, I distinctly remember being in love with "number seven on the CD with the man wearing glasses playing the guitar on the cover." I remember sitting in the Baldry's cottage, finding this CD, and telling Rashell that she needed to hear number 7, and she would love it. Once I found out the name of the song, I told myself that I would name my daughter Layla as a tribute to my first favorite song. It's such beautiful rendition. I love when fast, loud songs are remade to be serene and beautiful, and Eric Clapton did a phenomenal job of doing so.
"Rocky Raccoon" by The Beatles
I cannot help but think of my dad when I hear this song. I don't know when exactly he had first informed us of the classic line: "Her name was McGill, and she called herself Lil, but everyone knew her as Nancy" but he always comes to my mind when it plays. There was one trip we went on to Yosemite, and I can't remember if we had played this song, but we talked about it the entire time. We were at a gift shop where they were selling little raccoon stuffed animals holding acorns, and all three of us insisted on having one. I think Claire claimed the name "Rocky" first, but we all ended up naming our raccoons Rocky. We hopped back into Granny and Grandpa's van, drove back to Sonoma, where we met them at Ranch House, and showed them our newest friends. I loved going on adventures with my Dad.
"Red House" by Jimi Hendrix
The first time I met Hunter was when some of the ETC kids had gone to Mary's Pizza Shack for dinner, and I was elected to drive someone. After dinner, the red-headed kid got to ride with me in my dad's truck, and when I turned on the car, this song came blaring over the speakers. We had all been chatting and laughing over dinner, so we were only acquaintances. As we pulled onto Highway 12 and Hunter rolled down his window and screamed "I LOVE THIS GIRL! I LOVE THIS GIRL!" to the pedestrians, you can bet I was more than mortified. Who was this kid? I love that memory.
"She's A Rainbow" by The Rolling Stones
Erika got to fly alone before me, and I was so jealous that she even had her own traveling music routine down. She told me that it was necessary that every time she landed and walked towards baggage claim, she would play this song on her iPod as she walked. She said it was nice to play something uplifting and familiar as her homecoming theme, and to this day, I do the same thing, in her honor I suppose. I travel by myself more often than she does now, but I always have this song playing as soon as I step off the plane.
"Idaho" by Josh Ritter
I know I already have a Josh Ritter song in this compilation, but being my favorite, he needs two songs. "Idaho" is the epitome of a peaceful, soulful tribute to one's home. Josh Ritter grew up in the small town of Moscow, immersed in the land, surrounded by peace and quiet. Listening to this song conveys his life in Idaho so precisely, I assume. He's an incredible song writer and musician who doesn't have to try hard to captivate his audience. I dragged Jennelle and Heather to his concert with the Pops, and although they were not huge fans, Jennelle asked me afterwards to play "the song about him singing with wolves or something," and for a while, she would only have to say, "Hey, could you play the song?" and I'd know what she was referring to. He's addicting!
"Winter Song" by Ingrid Michaelson and Sara Bareilles
This song sounds like it's about love, but I interpret it as one about friendship. These two young women are astounding musicians, and they came together to write this adorable, serene song. It makes me think about my best friendships (Jennelle, Sierra, and Bethany), missing my sisters around the holidays, my family... I just think it's the sweetest tune, and it encompasses this past winter so strongly. This was another song that Jennelle would ask, "Could you play the song?" or "You thinking what I'm thinking?" and I'd just know that this song needed to be played.
"In My Place" by Coldplay
I fell in love the summer of 2005 when my dad, Erika, and I went to France to watch the Tour. We stayed in the French Alps, Alp d'Huez to be precise, with an Arizona-based cycling group. One of the leaders of the group was a French Canadian former rower named Pierrick, and it was love at first sight. Of course he was much too old for my brace-face, sixteen-year-old self, and he was newly happily married, but he was everything I knew I wanted in a man. I guess it was reassuring for me to see that amazing, kind, funny men DO exist, and he set the bar pretty high for my idea of a perfect companion. I was so smitten, it was painful! One afternoon while the guys were out riding, Erika and I rode around in the van with him, handing out water bottles and energy bars to struggling riders we saw along the way. Erika went off somewhere to take pictures, and Pierrick asked me if I liked Coldplay. I didn't really listen to them much at the time, but I was very enthusiastic with my "Yes!" in hopes of him falling in love with me too. In response to my answer, he began singing "In My Place", and I was done for. My heart was racing so quickly, I could hardly breathe! Naturally, this became my all-time favorite song after that, and when we left the Alps and headed towards Paris, I would listen to this constantly and sob. My heart ached so badly for love that summer, and what better place could I have found to test the potential of my young, untarnished love?
"Walking on Broken Glass" by Annie Lennox
Annie Lennox's voice is one of the best I've ever heard. As a kid, I wanted to be her so badly. I would listen to "Would I Lie To You?" and pretend like I was walking out on stage, "Keep Young and Beautiful" to practice my British accent, "Why" if I needed to get some tears out, and "Walking on Broken Glass" to work on my vocals. It sounds normal, but imagine a seven year old girl standing in the living room belting out Annie Lennox tunes. So cute! Anyway, despite my own history with this song, it will forever remind me of my amazing little sister. New Years Eve 1999/2000 (the Millennium), my parents had a big party with all of their friends. They had the idea of creating a mix tape of all of everyone's favorite songs from the last century, and each person had to choose a song and explain why they chose that particular song. My sisters and I were able to chose one song each, and Claire chose this one. She was eight years old at the time, although I remember her being much younger. Her reasoning was something along the lines of, "I chose this song because I really like walking on broken glass..." It was obvious that she was trying to be meaningful and insightful like the adults, but the way she worded it made her sound like she liked inflicting pain on herself. I think it was Joanie who pointed out the hilarity of what she had written, and Claire was so embarrassed! No one has ever let her live it down. It's just so precious, I can't even stand it.
When this mid-90's tune hits my ears, all I see is my mom's little white Toyota (again, hahah) driving down Arnold Drive through the SDC. It's usually either Spring or Fall in my memory, the air is fresh and temperate, and those incredible trees are either full of gorgeous green leaves, or the array of multicolored leaves have half fallen on the road. I am about seven or eight years old in my mind, wondering what "bizarre" means, and curious as to which parts of this song are actually bizarre. (It's funny to me that Erika hears this song and thinks of driving around with our babysitter.. I never made that association!)
"Right Moves" by Josh Ritter
Given this man is the one current artist that I never have and never will get tired of, it was difficult to choose one of his songs that stands out the most for me. This particular song is so uplifting, so exhilarating, mixing rock instruments, string instruments, horns, a simple melody, and an immense amount of enthusiasm. The line that follows the instrumental sings "I heard the night birds picking up their song, you threw your hair back and you sang along..." and I cannot hear that line without feeling giddy! The instrumental has such a strong build up, and by the time Josh comes back in, there is so much momentum and energy, it's difficult not to get excited. At his concert with the Boston Pops, I could have sworn that he smiled at me during that line too :)
"Playground Love" by Air
High school, mary jane, driving down Arnold Drive near Leveroni Road, my infatuation with a certain co-worker... This song has such a relaxing tone, it's difficult not to close your eyes and just sway to the beat. I know this was on the "Virgin Suicides" soundtrack, but sometimes I can picture this playing along to a sped-up film of a road.. a time lapse of sorts.. driving down a two-lane, foggy road, lined with redwood trees...
"Falling Slowly" by Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova
I saw their film "ONCE" just before I moved to Boston and absolutely fell in love with it and the soundtrack. When I first moved here, I was so full of excitement, newfound independence, and hope for love, and this song was especially prevalent in my life. The lyrics are simple yet relatable, and the harmony is one that can easily get the tears flowing. I picture myself sitting on the 77 up Mass Ave. in Arlington, staring at my cute bus driver, anticipating the chilly Northeastern air outside on my walk up to the house where I babysat, trying not to slip on the icy brick sidewalks.
"My Heart Will Go On" by Celine Dion
Anyone who was a preteen when this song came out knows why it made my memory list. I think I speak for every girl when I say that Jack Dawson was our first love, and I don't think any further explanation is necessary.
"Ladies and Gentlemen" by Saliva
Knowing me, this song is quite out of character, but allow me to explain. Jennelle moved into our apartment in September, and that fall, this song was part of some video game commercial that played every so often, and I loved it! I thought it was stupid to like a song that was part of a video game, so I never said anything. I was so intimidated by Jennelle's love of Metallica, System of a Down, and WBCN, her accent, and her humor, and I was convinced that I was too much of a goody-goody to be friends with someone so "hardcore" (I know this sounds like an exaggeration, but I'm serious!) Anyway, the video game commercial came on, and I quietly said, "I know this is lame, but I really like this song," and Jennelle was like, "Me too! I didn't want to say anything though!" "OMG me either!" I probably responded, and from then on, I was no longer intimidated by Jennelle. The cool girl and I had something in common, and I was set!
"Sensitive" by Jewel
This song radiates everything that is my incredible twin sister. As an innocent first grader, Erika heard this song and decided it was her favorite. Her distinctive round handwriting is in the front of our Dunbar yearbook, establishing this as her favorite song and Anabelle as her best friend. Listening to it now, I cannot help but cry. Erika has always been so wise beyond her years, so thoughtful and so intelligent, and I don't think she's ever gotten enough credit for it. For a six year old to hear this song and relate to it is phenomenal, and I can guarantee you she knew the deep meanings of what Jewel had written... "You always tell me that it's impossible to be respected and be a girl" ... I can just hear that little girl declaring that she was not going to let that happen in her life. She has always had such a sure sense of herself, her life, her morals and goals, and I admire her more than words can express.
"Time After Time" by Ella Fitzgerald
I don't know if Ella was the first to sing this, but her version is definitely one of my favorites. This song was number six on my list of songs to record for my senior project, and I only ended up recording five. Before I die, I am promising myself that I'm going to perform this on some occasion, be it in a studio, in a club somewhere (with my new roommate?! haha), who knows. I have a plan for this song too, but I don't want to write it anywhere and spoil the surprise, but hopefully within the next five or so years, my plan can be put into action! Such a beautiful love song.
"Marry You" by Eric Clapton and BB King
When this album came out, my uncle bought it for every single person he knew, trying to spread the glory that is the two of these great musicians collaborating. This was roughly around the time that my uncle and Phyllis had fallen in love, and I know that he probably thinks of her when he hears this song. It's a great song as it is, but knowing that it was the anthem of two incredible people falling in love with one another makes it all the more beautiful to me.
"Into the Mystic" by Van Morrison
One of the greatest songs of all time, hands down. I don't know if Hunter and I ever declared this as our song, but I will always think of him when I hear it. The soft guitar in the beginning, the simple verses, and the climactic chorus makes the heart beat much stronger.
"Pride and Joy" by Stevie Ray Vaughan
All I see is Highway 37, just past Sears Point, windows down, summertime, SRV blasting over the speakers, my dad playing seatbelt guitar like it's his job. He's so good! If I was driving, he'd have to listen to some Jimi (since Jimi was a lefty), but otherwise it was all about Stevie Ray Vaughan. Oh my god, I'm cracking up.. My dad is so cool! I can just see him biting his lower lip, squinting his eyes, and rocking out on his seatbelt with such devotion and power, you'd think he was a rockstar in his past life. Maybe he's where I get my musical talent! We'd take these random trips down to Marin, either to go hiking, see my grandparents, discover some new independent bike store, or just to go on an adventure for no reason.
"Feel it Now" by Black Rebel Motorcycle Club
"I'm on my own I'm sure I'll know it now, I'm on my own I'm sure I'll feel it now..." was the line I listened to over and over again in my homesickness. The song is comprised of a simple piano melody and a hauntingly beautiful harmony. A guitar comes in halfway through the song, but other than that, it is simple and enchanting.
"Somewhere Over The Rainbow" by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole
Where do I even begin my admiration for this rendition?! Not only is his voice one of the most soothing voices that has ever graced my ears, he combined two of the most amazing songs into such a emotion medley. It does bother me that the lyrics of "Somewhere Over The Rainbow" are not exactly what Judy Garland had originally sung, but I digress. "What a Wonderful World" was my Granny's favorite song, and while I will always cry at Louis' version, the second Israel starts singing, I cannot help but get a little weepy.
"The Way" by Fastball
I hope my mom remembers this moment, because it was what made me terrified of singing in public throughout my childhood. Let me tell a quick story before I explain the memory: When I was a little girl, I went through a phase where I wasn't that big of a fan of school, so I would pretend to be sick just to be able to stay home all day and watch music videos on VH1. All of the cool music played on MTV, but I preferred VH1 for some reason. Anyway, during this time, I was introduced to this band, Fastball. "The Way" was their new song, the music video was adventurous and cool, and I wanted nothing more than to be able to hear it whenever I wanted. Anyway, we were at Tower Records one day, and I went straight for the personal listening station, put on the headphones, and turned on this song as loud as I could. I was ecstatic, singing, dancing in place.. I looked over at my mom to share my thrill with someone, only to be greeted with the stares of every person in the store. My mom came running over, mortified, to let me know that I had been singing loudly off-key, and everyone in the store had heard me. SO embarrassing, right?! Ugh, I was humiliated. Thank god I was a kid so I could get away with it, but to this day, I will never forget standing in Tower, wearing my cream colored dress with purple flowers and my Tevas, rocking out to this song.
"Mardi Gras Fever" by Gatorbeat
You cannot grow up in Sonoma without being a fan of Gatorbeat. Every one of their songs has the ability to make even the shyest person get up and dance (me, for instance), but this song is what I think of when I think of them. We would travel around Northern California going to crawdad festivals, oceanside shows, hanging out with Richie's kids, dancing with beads around our necks, friendship necklaces, and being carefree hippy kids. The Domingue family is so loving and so incredibly optimistic, and I feel so honored to be able to know them personally. Gatorbeat's music epitomizes my childhood, and I LOVE IT!
"Nessun Dorma" by Luciano Pavarotti
There is no other way to play this song other than loudly and surrounded by the sound from all angles. It is such a passionate, climactic song, guaranteed to get the tears flowing if the timing is right and the emotions are vulnerable. Manowar did a rendition of this song (my knowledge of this is what got the head chef at my restaurant to think I was cool!) I personally do not think that anyone can top Pavarotti. He made this song as epic and definitive as could have been possible. Amazing!
"The Sea" by Morcheeba
I love my mom so much. My whole life, she has stressed the importance of the ocean in our life, taught us to trust how sacred it is, how to care about it as a way of healing, therapy, and stress reducer. We would hop in The Van, boogie boards in the back, surf board tied to the top of the car (stopping every fifteen minutes to try to get rid of the whistling the straps had created.. SO FUNNY!) We would make our way to Doran, Salmon Creek, or Bolinas, our little picnic basket filled with chips, salsa, homemade chicken salad, and a various piece of fruit. There is one stretch of road that winds its way through the hills right before the beaches appear, and that's what I think of when I hear this song.. I can picture our van cruising down the mountains, S-curving every which way, until finally the ocean became visible over the horizon.
"Fix Up, Look Sharp" by Dizzee Rascal
While we were working on Pippin, there was an orgy scene that we had to rewrite in order to make the show PG, and Cat had the brilliant idea of having a dance off instead. In order to inspire us and show us what she had in mind, we spent one rehearsal watching "RiZe", a documentary about the dance style "krumping" and its history in LA. This song was one of the main songs they danced to, so as a warm up, we would play this, stand in a circle, and just dance. We had to close our eyes and just let the music and the beat take ahold of our bodies and just let go. Every person had to go in the middle of the circle and dance by themselves, and I credit my ability to dance in public to this process. I still have very little rhythm, but this song always makes me want to dance.
"Take Five" by The Dave Brubeck Quartet
What an incredible piece of music, huh? Sometimes it reminds me of the old Chips Ahoy commercials, other times it reminds me of "Pleasantville", but mostly I think of Bethany and I going on adventures. We made a CD of all of the fantastic driving songs we could think of, and this was number one. The strongest memory I have with this song is that unbelievably long tunnel in Sausalito, heading out towards that old fort and Rodeo Beach.. do you know the one? It goes through the mountain?
"She's Only Happy In The Sun" by Ben Harper
I listened to this song over and over again while Erika, Grandma, and I were in Bermuda. At that point, Erika had an iPod and I didn't, so when she wasn't looking or around, I would steal it and just play this song. I was beginning to enter a pretty difficult time in my life, personally, and Ben Harper's voice was more than soothing. Being in Bermuda, I thought this to be especially appropriate, and once I was back in Sonoma, in the middle of my difficult time, I would listen to this and remember how amazing it felt to be laying in the warm sunshine, stretched out on that floating dock in the middle of that warm water, watching the planes take off and land... It still makes me a little sad to listen to it, knowing it was the anthem of my upset, lonely fifteen-year-old self.
"Layla (unplugged)" by Eric Clapton
Before I could even read very well, I distinctly remember being in love with "number seven on the CD with the man wearing glasses playing the guitar on the cover." I remember sitting in the Baldry's cottage, finding this CD, and telling Rashell that she needed to hear number 7, and she would love it. Once I found out the name of the song, I told myself that I would name my daughter Layla as a tribute to my first favorite song. It's such beautiful rendition. I love when fast, loud songs are remade to be serene and beautiful, and Eric Clapton did a phenomenal job of doing so.
"Rocky Raccoon" by The Beatles
I cannot help but think of my dad when I hear this song. I don't know when exactly he had first informed us of the classic line: "Her name was McGill, and she called herself Lil, but everyone knew her as Nancy" but he always comes to my mind when it plays. There was one trip we went on to Yosemite, and I can't remember if we had played this song, but we talked about it the entire time. We were at a gift shop where they were selling little raccoon stuffed animals holding acorns, and all three of us insisted on having one. I think Claire claimed the name "Rocky" first, but we all ended up naming our raccoons Rocky. We hopped back into Granny and Grandpa's van, drove back to Sonoma, where we met them at Ranch House, and showed them our newest friends. I loved going on adventures with my Dad.
"Red House" by Jimi Hendrix
The first time I met Hunter was when some of the ETC kids had gone to Mary's Pizza Shack for dinner, and I was elected to drive someone. After dinner, the red-headed kid got to ride with me in my dad's truck, and when I turned on the car, this song came blaring over the speakers. We had all been chatting and laughing over dinner, so we were only acquaintances. As we pulled onto Highway 12 and Hunter rolled down his window and screamed "I LOVE THIS GIRL! I LOVE THIS GIRL!" to the pedestrians, you can bet I was more than mortified. Who was this kid? I love that memory.
"She's A Rainbow" by The Rolling Stones
Erika got to fly alone before me, and I was so jealous that she even had her own traveling music routine down. She told me that it was necessary that every time she landed and walked towards baggage claim, she would play this song on her iPod as she walked. She said it was nice to play something uplifting and familiar as her homecoming theme, and to this day, I do the same thing, in her honor I suppose. I travel by myself more often than she does now, but I always have this song playing as soon as I step off the plane.
"Idaho" by Josh Ritter
I know I already have a Josh Ritter song in this compilation, but being my favorite, he needs two songs. "Idaho" is the epitome of a peaceful, soulful tribute to one's home. Josh Ritter grew up in the small town of Moscow, immersed in the land, surrounded by peace and quiet. Listening to this song conveys his life in Idaho so precisely, I assume. He's an incredible song writer and musician who doesn't have to try hard to captivate his audience. I dragged Jennelle and Heather to his concert with the Pops, and although they were not huge fans, Jennelle asked me afterwards to play "the song about him singing with wolves or something," and for a while, she would only have to say, "Hey, could you play the song?" and I'd know what she was referring to. He's addicting!
"Winter Song" by Ingrid Michaelson and Sara Bareilles
This song sounds like it's about love, but I interpret it as one about friendship. These two young women are astounding musicians, and they came together to write this adorable, serene song. It makes me think about my best friendships (Jennelle, Sierra, and Bethany), missing my sisters around the holidays, my family... I just think it's the sweetest tune, and it encompasses this past winter so strongly. This was another song that Jennelle would ask, "Could you play the song?" or "You thinking what I'm thinking?" and I'd just know that this song needed to be played.
"In My Place" by Coldplay
I fell in love the summer of 2005 when my dad, Erika, and I went to France to watch the Tour. We stayed in the French Alps, Alp d'Huez to be precise, with an Arizona-based cycling group. One of the leaders of the group was a French Canadian former rower named Pierrick, and it was love at first sight. Of course he was much too old for my brace-face, sixteen-year-old self, and he was newly happily married, but he was everything I knew I wanted in a man. I guess it was reassuring for me to see that amazing, kind, funny men DO exist, and he set the bar pretty high for my idea of a perfect companion. I was so smitten, it was painful! One afternoon while the guys were out riding, Erika and I rode around in the van with him, handing out water bottles and energy bars to struggling riders we saw along the way. Erika went off somewhere to take pictures, and Pierrick asked me if I liked Coldplay. I didn't really listen to them much at the time, but I was very enthusiastic with my "Yes!" in hopes of him falling in love with me too. In response to my answer, he began singing "In My Place", and I was done for. My heart was racing so quickly, I could hardly breathe! Naturally, this became my all-time favorite song after that, and when we left the Alps and headed towards Paris, I would listen to this constantly and sob. My heart ached so badly for love that summer, and what better place could I have found to test the potential of my young, untarnished love?
"Walking on Broken Glass" by Annie Lennox
Annie Lennox's voice is one of the best I've ever heard. As a kid, I wanted to be her so badly. I would listen to "Would I Lie To You?" and pretend like I was walking out on stage, "Keep Young and Beautiful" to practice my British accent, "Why" if I needed to get some tears out, and "Walking on Broken Glass" to work on my vocals. It sounds normal, but imagine a seven year old girl standing in the living room belting out Annie Lennox tunes. So cute! Anyway, despite my own history with this song, it will forever remind me of my amazing little sister. New Years Eve 1999/2000 (the Millennium), my parents had a big party with all of their friends. They had the idea of creating a mix tape of all of everyone's favorite songs from the last century, and each person had to choose a song and explain why they chose that particular song. My sisters and I were able to chose one song each, and Claire chose this one. She was eight years old at the time, although I remember her being much younger. Her reasoning was something along the lines of, "I chose this song because I really like walking on broken glass..." It was obvious that she was trying to be meaningful and insightful like the adults, but the way she worded it made her sound like she liked inflicting pain on herself. I think it was Joanie who pointed out the hilarity of what she had written, and Claire was so embarrassed! No one has ever let her live it down. It's just so precious, I can't even stand it.
Friday, March 27, 2009
bueno?
yesterday was phenomenal. absolutely wonderful. my first class was cancelled, so i got to sleep in, take my time getting ready, eat a good breakfast, and walk to school in 45 degree weather (i even wore flip flops for the occasion :) ) an unknown boy sent me a message that said "you're beautiful. what are you studying at UMB?" what a great day to randomly compliment someone, right?! so flattering! jennelle and i had a delicious sushi lunch, went home and did some homework, and then she made me a delicious cake (vanilla with chocolate frosting and sprinkles.. yummy!) before the delicious cake, though, i engaged in this fantastic conversation:
(phone rings)
"bueno?!"
"bueno? uh.. como estas?! eh.. feliz navidad!"
"HAHAHAhahahah!"
"oh, hahah, i mean, feliz.. huh? cumpleanos? FELIZ CUMPLEANOS!"
i seriously love my dad. so funny :)
thank you everyone, very very much, for the birthday wishes! you're all too kind :)
(phone rings)
"bueno?!"
"bueno? uh.. como estas?! eh.. feliz navidad!"
"HAHAHAhahahah!"
"oh, hahah, i mean, feliz.. huh? cumpleanos? FELIZ CUMPLEANOS!"
i seriously love my dad. so funny :)
thank you everyone, very very much, for the birthday wishes! you're all too kind :)
Thursday, March 12, 2009
three eff's and some elle.
this week hasn't been as nuts as i was anticipating, or perhaps it was and i'm not focusing. last night i made a big shrimp pasta dinner for eight of my friends.. i cannot believe kate gosselin does that every night! it was pretty tough, but in the end, i was so happy. every single person liked everything i prepared! leah is visiting right now, so her and danielle came over and danielle took control of the shrimp for me (thank you!) but i loved having everyone together :)
half of us sat at the table and the other half sat on the couches, and i guess it was awkward, even though i didn't sense that at all. i assumed we were all just eating quietly, but that's my oblivious side talking i suppose. i guess i also forgot to introduce everyone to danielle and leah, and i had the hardest time falling asleep last night because of it. i don't know why i got so upset by it, but i thought i had done everything perfectly, cooked this huge dinner, made everyone comfortable and full, and i missed a step. i suppose one doesn't immediately know how to be a dinner party hostess... it was my first time, give me a break! i'm making one huge mental note about the whole introduction thing though, so i promise i won't forget next time. jesus.
yesterday and today combined showed me the two most difficult tests i have ever taken. yesterday's midterm was literally a situation where i looked at the exam and had absolutely no idea what was being asked of me. today's was equally as difficult, but i think i did alright on it. and, conveniently, both of those classes rely on exam scores, so let's keep our fingers crossed that i don't screw this one up.
i have to close at work tonight, and then tomorrow i'm going to the harvard natural history museum for my biological anthropology class.. i'm actually pretty excited! jennelle leaves for florida around 3, so i'm going to try to pack as much as i can for HOME! i have to work lunch saturday and sunday, and on sunday, i'm leaving for the airport right when i get out of work. sunday is going to be a nightmare, but i think i'll be okay. i have to leave my suitcases in the office downstairs, so i have to be ready to leave on saturday night. and then, 11:30 PM pacific standard time, i will be in california!
it just so happens that my uncle tod and phyllis are flying out today, and because of that, my grandma and uncle are coming to town, and my grandpa and his wife, and because of THAT, erika is spending the weekend in sonoma, so it's going to be a big butler family reunion. i cannot wait! i'm going to miss most of the festivities, considering they are happening this weekend, but it should be wonderful.
half of us sat at the table and the other half sat on the couches, and i guess it was awkward, even though i didn't sense that at all. i assumed we were all just eating quietly, but that's my oblivious side talking i suppose. i guess i also forgot to introduce everyone to danielle and leah, and i had the hardest time falling asleep last night because of it. i don't know why i got so upset by it, but i thought i had done everything perfectly, cooked this huge dinner, made everyone comfortable and full, and i missed a step. i suppose one doesn't immediately know how to be a dinner party hostess... it was my first time, give me a break! i'm making one huge mental note about the whole introduction thing though, so i promise i won't forget next time. jesus.
yesterday and today combined showed me the two most difficult tests i have ever taken. yesterday's midterm was literally a situation where i looked at the exam and had absolutely no idea what was being asked of me. today's was equally as difficult, but i think i did alright on it. and, conveniently, both of those classes rely on exam scores, so let's keep our fingers crossed that i don't screw this one up.
i have to close at work tonight, and then tomorrow i'm going to the harvard natural history museum for my biological anthropology class.. i'm actually pretty excited! jennelle leaves for florida around 3, so i'm going to try to pack as much as i can for HOME! i have to work lunch saturday and sunday, and on sunday, i'm leaving for the airport right when i get out of work. sunday is going to be a nightmare, but i think i'll be okay. i have to leave my suitcases in the office downstairs, so i have to be ready to leave on saturday night. and then, 11:30 PM pacific standard time, i will be in california!
it just so happens that my uncle tod and phyllis are flying out today, and because of that, my grandma and uncle are coming to town, and my grandpa and his wife, and because of THAT, erika is spending the weekend in sonoma, so it's going to be a big butler family reunion. i cannot wait! i'm going to miss most of the festivities, considering they are happening this weekend, but it should be wonderful.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
151.00
today was gnarly. i started classes at 8 o'clock, was out by two, and had to work from four till close (which is two AM...) i've been exhausted all day, but for some reason now that i'm home, i don't/can't fall asleep. a storm is coming our way, and i'm keeping my fingers crossed that classes will be canceled so this staying up late won't come back and bite me tomorrow.
one of the classes that i'm taking is "images of the body" and i am so excited for it. we have to choose an image for next class, and i chose this one by renoir:
tonight at work, i had this table of three little old ladies. one of them asked why i didn't have an accent, so i told her i was from sonoma. this cute little old woman shrieked aloud, telling me that she LOVES sonoma, is a member of the benziger winery club (which i didn't even know existed...) and she even guessed the crossroads of our neighborhood from my slight description! it was just the cutest thing.
it's kind of ironic that i would have such an encounter, because i've thinking very strongly about moving back.. i know i've written many ideas on here, and i very well may change my mind again, but it just seems like a wonderful moment of opportunity for me, kind of like moving back east in the first place was. it's not that i really miss home, or that i hate boston now; it's quite the opposite, actually. it really comes down to the yearning i have to be close to my family. two years away has been great, but it's really very difficult to be so inconveniently far away from them. it's very hard to put into words exactly what i mean, and because of that i don't talk about this very much out loud. i feel like a part of me is missing though, and it's beginning to ache a little bit.
i'm slightly ashamed to admit, even though my dad told me not to be, but i feel a little bit hypocritical. i was so adamant about moving away from sonoma, from california, succeeding in a new place, refusing to be one of those SVHS kids who ends up at the JC. even more so, i refused to be one of the kids who goes off their respective distant school, only to find themselves back in sonoma, taking classes at the JC, because they couldn't survive in their original destination. i don't want to make any justifications or excuses about why i am probably going to end up like my worst nightmare, but two years is quite a while to live somewhere else, especially straight out of high school.
pardon all of this talk.. i'll most likely end up writing an entry in the new few weeks that's declaring my undying love for boston, or jumping for joy at my acceptance to NYU or something, but in the meantime, all i crave is california.
xoxo, ashley
one of the classes that i'm taking is "images of the body" and i am so excited for it. we have to choose an image for next class, and i chose this one by renoir:
tonight at work, i had this table of three little old ladies. one of them asked why i didn't have an accent, so i told her i was from sonoma. this cute little old woman shrieked aloud, telling me that she LOVES sonoma, is a member of the benziger winery club (which i didn't even know existed...) and she even guessed the crossroads of our neighborhood from my slight description! it was just the cutest thing.
it's kind of ironic that i would have such an encounter, because i've thinking very strongly about moving back.. i know i've written many ideas on here, and i very well may change my mind again, but it just seems like a wonderful moment of opportunity for me, kind of like moving back east in the first place was. it's not that i really miss home, or that i hate boston now; it's quite the opposite, actually. it really comes down to the yearning i have to be close to my family. two years away has been great, but it's really very difficult to be so inconveniently far away from them. it's very hard to put into words exactly what i mean, and because of that i don't talk about this very much out loud. i feel like a part of me is missing though, and it's beginning to ache a little bit.
i'm slightly ashamed to admit, even though my dad told me not to be, but i feel a little bit hypocritical. i was so adamant about moving away from sonoma, from california, succeeding in a new place, refusing to be one of those SVHS kids who ends up at the JC. even more so, i refused to be one of the kids who goes off their respective distant school, only to find themselves back in sonoma, taking classes at the JC, because they couldn't survive in their original destination. i don't want to make any justifications or excuses about why i am probably going to end up like my worst nightmare, but two years is quite a while to live somewhere else, especially straight out of high school.
pardon all of this talk.. i'll most likely end up writing an entry in the new few weeks that's declaring my undying love for boston, or jumping for joy at my acceptance to NYU or something, but in the meantime, all i crave is california.
xoxo, ashley
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
there's no place like home, part deux...
so, i'm sadly leaving california tonight. usually i am very anxious to get back to boston at this point in my trip, but this time, i am almost dreading going back. being home is so comforting, and after this homesickness-filled, stressful semester, there is no where else i'd rather be. BUT, i think mother nature might be eavesdropping my thoughts and concerns because boston is getting a storm tomorrow morning, and my flight is supposed to land right in the midst of it, so i may get to stay for a bit longer! i doubt it, but it's a possibility :)
this entire break has been filled with the twilight saga, collegeboard.com, photobooth, and lots of money spending (yikes about the last one.. i need to do some serious catching-up on my finances. well worth it though :)) here's some documentation:
i also think there is a possibility of moving to new york city earlier than i had planned! i've applied to a couple of schools there, so i'm keeping my fingers crossed that one of them works out. i was considering looking for schools in oregon, washington, and chicago, but i think staying on the east coast makes the most sense. i cannot quit.
this entire break has been filled with the twilight saga, collegeboard.com, photobooth, and lots of money spending (yikes about the last one.. i need to do some serious catching-up on my finances. well worth it though :)) here's some documentation:
i also think there is a possibility of moving to new york city earlier than i had planned! i've applied to a couple of schools there, so i'm keeping my fingers crossed that one of them works out. i was considering looking for schools in oregon, washington, and chicago, but i think staying on the east coast makes the most sense. i cannot quit.
Saturday, December 27, 2008
this evening has been so very nice...
i love sonoma! for some reason, it has felt so good to be home, more so this trip than any other. i haven't seen as many of my friends as i thought i would have by now, but hanging out with my family is fine enough for me :)
claire is incredible and so fun to hang out with.. i've missed her a lot, so it's just been really fantastic getting to hang out with her some more.
erika is absolutely stunning, so smart.. i'd forgotten, sort of, how majestic she is. we went on a bike ride/run the other morning, and even though we didn't say much, i loved being with her. that must sound so lame, but i can't really explain it, and i don't think it needs defending!
Monday, December 22, 2008
paaaarrrtaaaaay!
the girls and i hosted a little dinner party last night with all of our friends, and it ended up being so fantastic. we figured having a get together, making food, taking pictures, and all of that fun stuff would be better than just buying gifts for one another and trying to find the time to make the proper exchanges. i meant to make one of those cheesy announcements last night, but i never got the courage, i guess, to do so. i don't think the friends i've made out here really realize how much like family they are to me, which makes a little bit of sense, considering they're all locals and have their own families here. but with my real family so far away, i've created my own in my head with my friends, and i appreciated it so so much to have everyone together last night. i'm such a ham, but 'tis the season, right?
there's no place like home...
this is the heel-clicking stage of my departure home. it's early, which i don't mind too much because i have plenty of errands to run today. i think i'll leave for the airport around four, hoping to GOD (again) that the flights are on time by now. only roughly eighteen hours until i'm home!
i miss my sisters...
i miss my sisters...
Friday, December 19, 2008
Oh, Newport...
I woke up this morning after a mere three point five hours of sleep to catch the train to Rhode Island, and now here I am sitting in the lovely little home of my lovely aunt and uncle :) Twenty minutes ago, outside was normal, dry, and freezing; yet, now, as I type this, I am looking outside and seeing nothing but white! Around eight to ten inches of snow is expected today, and it couldn't be more incredible! New England architecture is a perfect haven for winter-related scenery too, so everything looks so quaint and adorable.. so cozy! These are just little flakes, but the trees, the houses, everything is completely coated.
Tomorrow night, the whole family is coming over for a big ol' pre-christmas feast! Josh just got home from Idaho last night, and now I'm here, so they all see it as a time for some family gathering and celebration, which makes me feel really great. It's so fun having a big family out here, and having them want to celebrate the fact that I'm visiting. Deborah just got engaged too, so I guess it's an Ashley's here / Josh's here / Deborah's engaged / Christmas bash. Oh well, either way, it makes me all warm and fuzzy witnessing the immense amounts of love that are in this side of my family.
It only makes me that much more excited for California!
My flight is on Monday, and I am praying to the almighty king of kings, lord of lords, thou who shall reign forever and ever, Jesus Christ, that my flight won't be delayed and/or canceled. I would be so upset! Hopefully this gorgeous snow storm will be nice to me. In the meantime, this three point five hours of sleep is catching up with me, and this is the perfect weather for a nice little nap.
xoxox, ash
Tomorrow night, the whole family is coming over for a big ol' pre-christmas feast! Josh just got home from Idaho last night, and now I'm here, so they all see it as a time for some family gathering and celebration, which makes me feel really great. It's so fun having a big family out here, and having them want to celebrate the fact that I'm visiting. Deborah just got engaged too, so I guess it's an Ashley's here / Josh's here / Deborah's engaged / Christmas bash. Oh well, either way, it makes me all warm and fuzzy witnessing the immense amounts of love that are in this side of my family.
It only makes me that much more excited for California!
My flight is on Monday, and I am praying to the almighty king of kings, lord of lords, thou who shall reign forever and ever, Jesus Christ, that my flight won't be delayed and/or canceled. I would be so upset! Hopefully this gorgeous snow storm will be nice to me. In the meantime, this three point five hours of sleep is catching up with me, and this is the perfect weather for a nice little nap.
xoxox, ash
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
sigur ros, please.
i love family and the holiday season. my dad and i drove to syracuse yesterday to visit my uncle tod and his family, and i can't even believe how much i missed them. tod and phyllis are so hospitable and loving, it's fantastic :) snowflakes were falling last night that had the same diameter as an orange, no joke. it was insanity!
my creative writing professor played this song for us on tuesday for a writing prompt, and i literally started crying in class. it's just so beautiful and emotional, i couldn't contain myself! is that silly? anyway, have a listen.. you'll want to save the world, just like i did.
my creative writing professor played this song for us on tuesday for a writing prompt, and i literally started crying in class. it's just so beautiful and emotional, i couldn't contain myself! is that silly? anyway, have a listen.. you'll want to save the world, just like i did.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
wanna hear a story?
this morning, i was awoken by a text message from my dad asking me if i was awake (which i wasn't planning on being at 7 AM on a sunday...) but I decided not to write him back until I was really awake. I thought though, how weird that dad is awake at 4 AM asking if I was awake too... right? I figured it was a mistake or delayed text though, but five minutes later, right as i was falling back asleep, he wrote me a message that said "it's a beautifa day" (inside family joke...) and i was like, what is he talking about? It can't be a beautiful day at 4 AM! maybe he's sending these on accident. So, right as I was writing him back, asking if he was intentionally sending me these random texts, he called! what the fuck? i thought.
panicked, i answered, "hello? dad? are you alright?"
"hey ash, i'm fine, yeah, don't worry. say, what floor are you on?"
"second. why?"
"look outside."
i figured he had a case of insomnia and decided to check the weather in boston and found it had snowed overnight. looking outside, i said, "dad, it's not snowi- you have to be kidding me. are you kidding me right now?!"
"hahahah, it's freezing. let me in!"
my incredible father was standing there, in the parking lot of harbor point, and SURPRISED ME!!!! i obviously burst into tears and ran downstairs to let him in.
----
now, we're sitting in the apartment, and i'm in utter shock. my whole family knew about this and didn't tell me! mom, claire, uncle tod, EVERYONE. this couldn't have come at a more perfect time, considering my overwhelming homesickness. i just love my family so unbelievably much, it's indescribable. he's staying all week too! oh my god, i love my life.
panicked, i answered, "hello? dad? are you alright?"
"hey ash, i'm fine, yeah, don't worry. say, what floor are you on?"
"second. why?"
"look outside."
i figured he had a case of insomnia and decided to check the weather in boston and found it had snowed overnight. looking outside, i said, "dad, it's not snowi- you have to be kidding me. are you kidding me right now?!"
"hahahah, it's freezing. let me in!"
my incredible father was standing there, in the parking lot of harbor point, and SURPRISED ME!!!! i obviously burst into tears and ran downstairs to let him in.
----
now, we're sitting in the apartment, and i'm in utter shock. my whole family knew about this and didn't tell me! mom, claire, uncle tod, EVERYONE. this couldn't have come at a more perfect time, considering my overwhelming homesickness. i just love my family so unbelievably much, it's indescribable. he's staying all week too! oh my god, i love my life.
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