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today was gnarly. i started classes at 8 o'clock, was out by two, and had to work from four till close (which is two AM...) i've been exhausted all day, but for some reason now that i'm home, i don't/can't fall asleep. a storm is coming our way, and i'm keeping my fingers crossed that classes will be canceled so this staying up late won't come back and bite me tomorrow.


one of the classes that i'm taking is "images of the body" and i am so excited for it. we have to choose an image for next class, and i chose this one by renoir:

tonight at work, i had this table of three little old ladies. one of them asked why i didn't have an accent, so i told her i was from sonoma. this cute little old woman shrieked aloud, telling me that she LOVES sonoma, is a member of the benziger winery club (which i didn't even know existed...) and she even guessed the crossroads of our neighborhood from my slight description! it was just the cutest thing.

it's kind of ironic that i would have such an encounter, because i've thinking very strongly about moving back.. i know i've written many ideas on here, and i very well may change my mind again, but it just seems like a wonderful moment of opportunity for me, kind of like moving back east in the first place was. it's not that i really miss home, or that i hate boston now; it's quite the opposite, actually. it really comes down to the yearning i have to be close to my family. two years away has been great, but it's really very difficult to be so inconveniently far away from them. it's very hard to put into words exactly what i mean, and because of that i don't talk about this very much out loud. i feel like a part of me is missing though, and it's beginning to ache a little bit.


i'm slightly ashamed to admit, even though my dad told me not to be, but i feel a little bit hypocritical. i was so adamant about moving away from sonoma, from california, succeeding in a new place, refusing to be one of those SVHS kids who ends up at the JC. even more so, i refused to be one of the kids who goes off their respective distant school, only to find themselves back in sonoma, taking classes at the JC, because they couldn't survive in their original destination. i don't want to make any justifications or excuses about why i am probably going to end up like my worst nightmare, but two years is quite a while to live somewhere else, especially straight out of high school.

pardon all of this talk.. i'll most likely end up writing an entry in the new few weeks that's declaring my undying love for boston, or jumping for joy at my acceptance to NYU or something, but in the meantime, all i crave is california.

xoxo, ashley